New year, new twist on the old resolutions

Well, happy new year! I've been trying to figure out what one resolution I could make. The trouble is, I have too many, and most I have to re-resolve every single day. Try to keep blood sugar on an even keel - yep, every day, all day, I try. Keep my daughter out of harm's way - all the time, every day. (I try perhaps too hard at work, too.)

So I'm looking for a higher goal, so to speak: I'm looking for balance. To remember that I never intended to do everything, all the time. I always knew I didn't want to be Supermom. I just want to be there for my daughter when she really needs me, to find some time to pursue what I most like to do, to spend quality time with my family, and to be healthy enough to be able to do all these things and enjoy them.

Okay, so it takes a lot of work and frustration to maintain that level of health, when you're diabetic, doesn't it? The other part of this resolution is to have patience with myself.

Oh, and I guess I need to have patience with other people, too. Like the mail-order pharmacy that messed up my insulin delivery, letting it sit on my doorstep overnight in the bitter cold (no, enzymes don't work well once they've been frozen, and insulin is an enzyme). This despite my tying to order the insulin in early December (they lost the prescription), then postpone delivery (they said I could postpone it later if need be), then saying they could neither postpone it nor redirect it, on what turned out to be the day before they mailed it (according to UPS tracking). So they will have to resend it - probably at no extra cost to me, except a lot of time to straighten it out. But still, what a waste.

So here are my two cents (or more) on the healthcare debate. I'd say that, for all the time I spend fighting to get the healthcare I need, I spend about as much time trying to avoid expensive healthcare that I don't need, or dealing with screwups like this one that cause waste. Most of the care I've gotten for diabetes has been essential, but the treatments for migraines and for more mild, transient conditions I've had have been highly wasteful. Like the prescription for Enbrel, a topical drug for psoriasis, that I was given when all I had was some dry skin. (I didn't get the prescription filled; I just wanted to know whether it was dry skin or a fungal problem, to know whether I should keep the skin moist or dry. Hand lotion did the trick!). If all these wasted dollars were spent on proper diagnosis and more targeted treatments, and more careful use of existing treatments, we'd be far better off. Better educational support for insulin pump users fits into this category, too. Like I've said before (several times), I wish I'd had the kind of bootcamp I had at the Joslin (during pregnancy) a long time ago. Yes, pump therapy is expensive, but it's less expensive, I'll wager, than a foot amputation!

Hopping back off the soapbox, I'd like to end on a positive note, that I am grateful for all that I have had in 2009, and still have: A wonderful daughter, a loving, understanding husband (having grown up with a mom with type 1, he's well versed), and great family and friends. Oh, and a job!